The Bosses Must Be Crazy!

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Thanks to Flecken for writing such a brilliant poem about me.

Spring, you have my sympathy.
I'm really glad that you're not me.
Or rather, glad that I'm not you,
with all the things your bosses do
to make you crazy and upset.
I'm amazed you haven't taught them yet
to not be doing such mean things
to a dog as cute as Spring....
like wrapping things around your nose
and always poking at your toes
and putting you inside that crate...
which are all things I know you hate.
And letting Lyle get in your pool
Is really just so mean and cruel.
You put up with so much, I know.
And never let your anger show.
Some lesser dogs would snap and bite
But not you, Spring, 'cause it's not right
to bite the hand from which you eat,
even when it pokes your feet!
But still, you need to set them straight...
no more poking, no more crate,
no more things wrapped 'round your snout;
it's not too hard to figure out
that these are things that you don't like
and doing them just isn't right.
Yet still you love the bosses, Spring.
Even when they do those things.
You're always patient, always sweet....
I know you make their lives complete.
I hope they know how great you are
(much better than the Loo by far!)

Little did Flecken know that things were soon to take a turn for the worse.

It all started about a little over a week ago.  The boss ma'am is going though a bit of a rough stretch at work as one of her friends resigned.  Granted, she has loads of other friends there but she was worried that he might be the first of many.  Anyway, a week ago Saturday, the bosses thought that maybe they should foster a dog while she was off for a week to help get her mind off work related things.  And of course, the boss man's volunteering at the Woodford Humane Society meant that he knew just the dog.  Well, he calls to find out that she already was in a foster to adopt program so disaster averted.  Or so I thought.

Fast forward to Wednesday and the boss ma'am is still upset about work and is in fact looking for a new job.  Maybe seriously, maybe not.  Only time will tell.  But then she says that she wants to go to the humane society to "take her mind off it all" so the boss man loads up the truck and they head to Versailles. 

Extra, before she came home.Turns out, Rasha had already been returned so the boss man introduces her to the boss ma'am and they decide to foster her.  Now, in all fairness, the humane society is busting at the seams with animals these days and with the heat wave This heat wave sucks!that we've been having, the really do need the help so I was okay with it in theory.  They arrived home and took us for a walk together (the boss ma'am's answer to all dog introductions) and we were set.

I knew right from the start that things were not going well.  Lyle and I told her (in any of the four or five different names that the bosses have been trying out) that the bosses were the figure heads of the pack and that we referred to them as the boss man and boss ma'am.  (Naturally I took her aside and told her that I was the official head of the pack.)  Well, she didn't seem to fully grasp the concept because the little brownnoser starts off right away calling the boss ma'am my lady.   What sort of rubbish is that?  They are not royalty for barking out loud!

Well, the brownnosing didn't improve.  Turns out she doesn't know how to walk on a leash properly.  She thinks that a dogs place is slightly behind the person walking rather than pulling the human along.  Also, she seems to think that it is wise for the bosses to go out the door first.  Well, let's just say that with that kind of attitude I never would have caught that bunny this week!  (The highlight of the week.)Cutesy Biggy

Thursday wasn't a complete bust at least.  The bosses wanted to go for a long drive on Friday and wanted to know how we'd all get along in the car together.  Naturally that meant a trip to Brusters.  Sadly, where Lyle and I used to get our own doggie sundaes, the bosses were worried that petite little (I think at the time) Dixie couldn't finish one so we had to split two among three dogs.  Still, mmm ice cream.  Then later that night the bunny thing (all hail the victorious hunter Spring!)

Friday was not quite as good.  See, I have a snuggle sack in the basement next to the bosses exercise equipment where I supervise their workouts.  Miele was already starting to take over as the top dog in her quiet but very assuming way.  Still, I ran right to my snuggle sack and settled in for the next hour.  Miele spent the next half hour or so exploring the basement then, having had enough, KICKED ME OUT OF MY SNUGGLE SACK!  No teeth.  No growls.  She just moved right in.  I was so shocked.  I couldn't believe that I had to finish out the hour laying on the cool hard concrete floor.

The snuggling suck up watching TV with the boss ma'am.After that, we loaded up the truck and headed to Ashland, Kentucky to scout out the area.  Tail-gating!  Hahaha.  I crack myself up!Miele started out in the boss ma'am's lap and even though she is a snuggling suck up, she didn't like it there so we traded spots.  Riding in the boss ma'am's lap is really the only way to ride (since the boss man's lap is strictly off limits for all dogs).  Lyle was in the back, jealous as heck.  For the hour and a half, he kept poking his head up and asking if he could be a front seat whigle.  Eventually he gave up.  But then he started with the "Are we there yet?" questions.  Let me tell you, he is nothing if not persistent.    When we finally arrived in Ashland and slowed down to city speeds, he saw a park and started screaming "We're here!" and we probably would have gotten out for a little wander if not for the No Dogs Allowed postings.  Spooty park!  It probably wasn't any good anyway.

We wen't to DQ.  Thanks Angus!  Woo Woo!Well, we didn't get out in Ashland or Ironton, OH for that matter either.  Huntington, WV was another story.  And, oh, what a story it was.  Turns out, they have this park that runs along the Ohio River and that there are hundreds of ducks that live on the river.  I'd never met a duck before but it turns out that I LOVE DUCKS!  Holey moley, do I love ducks.  I jumped in right after them and swam as far as my little leash would allow.  The bosses thought Lyle would like ducks (and he did) but they never would have guessed that I'd turn out to be such a swimmer.  I think if they would have brought the 16 foot stretchy leash instead of the 6 foot one I would have caught one.  This is where I got to chase the ducks!

Anyway, back to the interloper.  By now Lyle and I were helping to come up with names for her.  We came up with helpful suggestions like Extra, Other, Unnecessary and Lyle's personal favorite, Upgrade (hardy har har).  So anyway, even though Mia was just a Foster Dog without a real name, she's managed to wind the boss ma'am very tightly around her dew claw.  As an example, on Thursday morning already, we were taking our morning walk when a neighbor lady exclaims how cute we were.  Well, the boss ma'am says thank you and keeps walking.  The boss man (this is why I love him) says that Rasha was a Foster Dog from the Woodford Humane Society and that if she is interested, she can read about her on their website.  The I was even jealous that she was getting Lyle's old crate.neighbor lady was delighted.  The boss ma'am was grumpy and asked the boss what the heck he was thinking telling the "crazy neighbor lady" that Rasha was available for adoption.  Worse yet, for the last two nights, Sweet Pea has been making these "cutesy" whines about an hour after bedtime.  Even though I've been working them for almost a year now, I've yet to receive bed privileges.  This morning the boss ma'am confided in the boss that if he hadn't said no, she would have invited the little stinker up!  Can you believe that nonsense?  I've been hearing for a year now how Little Bit only earned bed privileges after years of good behavior and now this dog without a Real Name almost scored a spot (on the new mattress I might add) after only a few nights!

So is Sweet Pea a Foster Dog?  My bet is that it will only last until the boss man's next visit to the Woodford Humane Society.  After that, I'm afraid Lyle and I will be stuck with her.  He loves me.Still, I know the boss man loves me because he took me for some special Spring time last night for a ride in the car.